There are many casualties of divorce, and one of mine was my relationship with my children. I missed most of their adolescence, and when I was there, the maternal unit was usually irritated about something. I'm not sure a greater presence by me in that house would have done much to improve their lives, and I can see tremendous potential to make them worse. I refused to put them in a position between the ex and I, and in doing so, placed myself further away. Perhaps one day, we'll move beyond that.
I was somewhat surprised when I received a text message towards 8 P.M. on New Year's Eve from #1 Son. He was asking if he could come up and spend the night. Of course, I said he could, and a very few hours later, he and his girlfriend were on my couch watching things drop on TV while sharing a rum drink. The following day, we had a delightful lunch al fresco in downtown Raleigh soaking up the almost 70-degree afternoon.
I can work with that, and he gets a much deserved thank you.